Learnnig As We Go!!!

Okay, it is story time right off the bat!!

STORY TIME

When I was six years old, my mom tried to teach me to tie my shoes. She tried (kind of), but I just could not catch on the couple times I remember her trying to show me how to tie a bow. She would be come so frustrated, she just told me to get up on the couch and she would do it herself. Of course when you are six and knowing you displeased your mother, then I was unhappy too and it just made matters worse.

I started first grade and did not know how to tie my shoes. Just for the record, I never went to Kindergarten so I didn’t learn there either. But I had a wonderful first grade teacher, Mrs. Fagan. Of all my teachers, she still remains my favorite. I still remember the afternoon we were going out for recess and she told me I had to tie my shoes before I could go out and play. I bent down and pretended to tie them as best I could, enough to get by with a glance and off I went to play for recess. When it was time to go home, she called my name and asked me to stay after school for a few minutes to talk to me. “You need to tie your shoe before you can go home”. I looked down at the floor and quietly said, “I don’t know how”. I was so ashamed because I didn’t know how to tie my shoes, but more importantly I had disappointed someone I cared about.

She grabbed my little chin in her hands, and pulled upward to make me look at her. “It’s okay” she said, “I will teach you.” So for 15 minutes every night after school for two weeks, she patiently taught me the process of how to tie my shoes. On the night I was finally able to show my mom, we were getting ready to go to the bowling alley. “Get up on the couch so I can tie your shoes!” she yelled. I looked at her and grinned, “I already did” and then proudly showed her my nice neat bows on my shoes. “How did you learn how to do that?” “Mrs. Fagan taught me.” I don’t remember the rest of what happened with this conversation, only that I learned to tie my shoes thanks to my first grade teacher.

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So what has this got to do with No Sugar, No Soda you ask? Ha Ha I love reading your comments. Thank you, first of all for opening up and sharing your struggles and triumphs with us. I know often times that is not easy. Second of all I am learning (just as all of you are) we all don’t have the answers and we need to pull from one another for ideas and things that have worked for others.

Yesterday, I was frustrated because a stupid scale told me I was too fat to get on it. Why did I get upset over that? Someone else made a comment (maybe on Kathy’s Blog) that they thought if they gave up the sugar and soda we could have anything else we wanted. We can’t? (Ha Ha) But the point is, 

WE ALL HAVE TO KEEP TRYING!!

I think one of the things that really set me off with the whole scale thing (yes this is the rest of the story!) is that I discovered these wonderful New Sugar Free Strawberry Crèmes that are delicious!!! They are made by Russel Stover in case you are curious.  I was so confident in myself I bought some as a "treat".  Then when I got home and the scale wouldn't weigh me it set me off.  So my one little one I was going to have yesterday turned into a few little ones. I felt as though I failed so miserably TWICE yesterday.

I think it is odd for me, I can sit there and not get angry at someone who I felt was judging me (see earlier post about Challenging Day) yet I can get mad at a stupid scale.  Go Figure. Someone mentioned they would have laid into the lady, but the one thing I have learned to control my anger and temper because YES I DO HAVE ONE!  I have learned I have to stay somewhat calm and even keeled or watch out!  My whole life has been like an emotional roller coaster ride.  I was once told I was Jekyll/Hyde and they never knew which one of me was coming out that day. I have only recently learned how to control my anger (I think) anyway.  I learned that when ever I was in drama mode or turmoil that is when I would get frustrated, upset and then get just plain mad.  I saw in giving up sugar, that I did not have the emotional roller coaster in me that has lived for so long.  The moment I went back on sugar the ride started again. 

So why is it, I can handle people okay but not a stupid scale? I think I have decided it is not time for a scale yet, so I am going to take it back and let someone else enjoy it.  Tying this all into the beginning, this whole weight loss, dieting, life style change - what ever you call it is a journey. There is not wrong or right way to do something, just what works for you. We are all just learning as we go!!  My friend Shaleen reminded me when my mom passed away, "Laura, if you were never taught how to love or how to give--then how do you know how to do that?" She made me realize that everything is something we have learned some way.  So it is with this journey.  There are so many good ideas on how to help each of us, different options for different lifestyles, food likes etc that we can do this. I had a very patient first grade teacher who taught me to tie my shoe, just like all of us (including myself) need to be patient with ourselves as we try to learn what works for us.

With all that said, what is it that has surprised you the most that you have learned so far?  It can be anything!!!  Just think, tomorrow is January 14 and we will have been doing this for 14 Days!

Good Job Everyone!

Are Our Emotions Eating Us Alive?

Being overweight is a touchy subject.  People have told me bluntly, "If you know you are overweight, why can you just lose weight?"  One friend even told me, "You are only overweight because you want to be."  This weight issue has always frustrated me, because it was my excuse and scape goat for EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE that went wrong.

I have never known what it was like to be small.  For me I came into this world over weight at almost 13 lbs I was told.  It frustrates me.  A friend once said when she saw my chubby baby pictures, "I love chubby babies, they are so cute!"  Why is it acceptable to love chubby babies, but not chubby adults?  Why can't people just accept us as we are?  The truth is as adults we are not accepted into society, because the people who are quick to judge have most likely never been in these shoes.

Before, all this would overwhelm me to the point I would give up and learned to live within society's snickers and laughs.  I have asked myself since beginning to drop weight, what changed this time?  I wish I had an answer, I think I would be rich!!!  Ha Ha  I don't, but I have seen a few observations.

There were two things I had to come to grip with.  One I had to accept the fact I was "obese" and not just overweight, big boned, or fat.  I was obese.  That was a hard word for me to say.  After all if I was considered overweight at only 20 lbs above my ideal weight, then maybe being called obese at this size was just a society thing and I wasn't really obese. Right? I could still walk and take care of my self and obese people I had seen on the news could not even get out of bed.  Yeah, I was playing with my mind.  So first of all I finally had to accept and tell myself I was obese.  According to reference.com, a person is considered obese if their BMI is 30 or above.  Between 25-29.9 is overweight.

I thought admitting I was obese was hard to do, but it was not as hard as the second thing. The second thing is not just one big thing, it is a million little things all together. But it all ties back to one thing, emotions.
I have a friend who has watched my weight loss journey unfold.  She talked to me about her daughter and her struggles with weight loss.  She made me stop and take a look back at life--again!!  Have you ever felt:

• Angry? 
• Hopeless? 
• Out of control?  
• Unappreciated?  
• Bored?  

If you have (and I am betting all of us have) what do you do?  I was all of the above.  The one thing that got me going was the "out of control" trigger.  Giving up sugar and soda was the only thing I could do to begin to have some control over my life.

Now I can go back on my life and see other areas I need to get a grip on and work on those as well.  My anger has pretty much dissolved by leaving the sugar alone it seems.  The hopelessness, with no job for almost two years (it gets hairy at times) but somehow little miracles show up and I am okay for another month.  I probably have the hardest time with unappreciated, I know I am appreciated and loved but I have a very hard time telling myself this.  A couple of weeks ago a friend at church called me on the carpet for it, "Go ahead say it!!  Say it!"  I just teared up,  "Say you love yourself Laura" I couldn't.  I am trying, and it is very hard for me.

I try to tell every person that will listen to me, this journey is not all about the food and exercise you do or do not do. Everyone has the perfect diet for me to try,  I remember I am on a journey and this is a life style change not a quick fix. It is only one piece of the puzzle.  We need to remember there are many pieces, and we have to continue to find those pieces we are missing and those pieces we have found where they go in our lives. 

This was me at 18.  Do I look like I am an animal?  Or that I need to lose 100lbs?  That's what I was often called and told.  At this size, I was referred to, as a cow, horse, ox and bull in a china closet.  I was about 190 at the time, so I thought everyone was suppose to weigh 100 lbs.  So as my life progressed, my weight was always an issue.  I was never good enough for anyone or anything.  Do you now see how emotions play such an affect on the whole weight loss cycle?

For those that have been losing weight Congrats!!!  For those who are struggling and not losing what they think they should, don't give up.  Take a look at these five emotions.  For me, I think that I need to tape them to my fridge as a reminder to me of why I am eating.  Remember this is a work in progress.  If sugar and soda overwhelm you, go with one.  Then the next step, is maybe to eliminate another.

I just want you all to know,  I know this is not an easy journey but the rewards at the end will be so worth it.  I was telling a friend today, one of my next steps is to get my hair cut and go back to wearing make up etc. She looked at me as though she wanted to ask "Why not now?"  and I said, "Because I am not there yet."  This is your journey!!  Don't let anyone else tell you how you are going to do it.  All I ask is that you not give up.  And if you get to the point you want to--remember to give back!  Find a way to serve.  I promise it will boost those emotions and put you back on track!!!

Don't forget to take before pictures to refer back to on this journey.

Thank you again everyone for reading the blog!!

Week 2--Seeing Any Changes Yet?

This week my friend and I were talking about the affects that sugar play on us.  She is diabetic and all of a sudden I could tell a huge difference in her temperament and how she was handling small things.  I asked her if she had checked her sugar level?  She glared at me and scowled a bit and then checked her blood sugar.  A few months ago I had begun to notice a change and when she checked her blood sugar she found it to be low.  I suggested she bring a snack with her to keep her blood sugar up.  So today when she checked it, she came and said, "you think you are so smart don't you?"  and grinned.  Her sugar was low again.  She turned to me with a very confused look and said, "How did you know?"  I said, "Because I saw your temperament go from calm and sweet to very agitated."  This was not my sweet friend I loved, I knew something was out of sync.  And so it is with all of us.

 I know we all think we know ourselves better than anyone else, and for the most part we do.  But there are  times that we change and do not recognize it, but others do.  We all do this!!!  I suspect one of the biggest culprits of our yo yo of emotions is our sugar levels.  When I was off sugar I was pretty even keeled, not getting agitated, stressed or impatient.  I realized a couple of days into back on my sugar I was on a emotional roller coaster ride again.  I had been off it for so long, I forgot what it was like to be on it!!!  It is not a fun ride. I had more nights of tears than I care to ever remember.  I was so ready for January 1st to start to go back off the sugar and soda, I could hardly wait.  But I didn't realize how bad the sugar affected me until I was talking to my friend.

I have been asked if I have more energy by going off the sugar and soda.  Some days I do, other days I don't notice it as much. The thing I see more change than anything is my temperance. I know this sounds crazy, but let me tell you a little story.

STORY TIME

At one point in my life I was taking a different approach on weight loss and started attending a diet clinic.  Every week you were weighed and your blood pressure taken.  Interesting enough each week my blood pressure was "different". One week it would be really low, and the next week sky high, then low again and then sky high.  After three or four weeks of this, they had me see one of the "boss's" of the clinic.  She looked at my file and looked at me and said, "You are 46?"  I said "Yes". Then came the list of questions. How much did you weigh when you were born?  Are you tired all the time?  Do you feel like an emotional roller coaster?  The one I remember when I saw the light bulb come on was when she asked me if I had ever had blood work done?

To give you a bit of background on this, at one time I worked for Vanderbilt University in the OBGYN department of the medical school.  I had the best and most knowledgeable doctors there.  I had blood work taken THREE times because they were shocked with my results.  I was told my blood work was perfect and people would pay me good money for my results.  After all blood work doesn't lie does it?

In another time in trying to take off the weight and discussing this with a dietitian she said, "Oh no someone did something wrong."  They were having a cholesterol screening at her clinic and challenged me to get  free testing done.  I tried to explain they would not find anything but she insisted that I be tested, which I was --- THREE TIMES!!!  Why?  Because they could not get a reading out of me.  And they too told me there was nothing wrong with me except basically I was very obese and had to find a way to take the weight off.

So back at the clinic where I was being asked if I had ever had blood work done, I related the scenarios above. "Ahhhhhh, let's go chat."  I got scared, because I knew for the first time in my life someone was going to be able to tell me what was wrong with me and it was just not all in my head.  I had been told all my life if I just ate less and excerised more I could lose the weight.  No wonder I beat myself up over weight loss!

She explained I had what was called Estrogen Dominance.  Most women will have a 50-50 balance and I had a very elevated level, more like a 90% instead of a 50%.  Due to the high level of Estrogen she thought it masked my blood work.  So it may be I have diabetes or high cholesterol and once I began to lose weight it would more than likely show up.  When I asked her how I could lose the weight, she told me by leaving the sugar, soda and carbs alone like the pasta, potatoes, bread etc.  I sat there in amazement!!!  Because when I had done that and everyone told me how wrong it was.  "For you" she said, "It was the best thing you could have done."

So you are asking yourself, well duh Laura if you know this why are you not doing it?  Because it is so hard to give it up! I also forgot how much better I felt.  As I said earlier, I realized really today how much better I was feeling being off the sugar.  So I am just wondering if any of you are seeing changes yet?  Now that we are starting week 2, how does everyone else feel and do you see any changes?  I know Wendy S has lost 10 lbs!!!  For me I can sure feel a difference.  Mainly the roller coaster and emotions have stopped!!!  Yeaa Me!!

I know seeing less pounds helps us know that we are doing something right, but sometimes the biggest changes are not in the pounds but in emotions or clothes?  Anyone seen a change?  Please share!!!

Combatting The Sugar Portion....

Why is it we feel as though we must have that candy bar right then and there? Have you ever done that? Standing in line and right there is your favorite candy bar. We all have a favorite and it is most likely at the checkout stand as we are leaving. You hear it and it is screaming, “Wait you forgot me!!”

I was talking to a dietitian once and told her about my giving up sugar for a period of time. She found that interesting and asked, “Why do you feel you need to give it up?” I tried to explain to her my addiction to sugar and her comment to me was, “There is a piece of chocolate cake I have had my eye on now for two weeks in the cafeteria and it is still there. I know when I go back, there will be a piece of chocolate cake if I want it. So I tell myself, “I don't want this today, maybe tomorrow.” 

Two things I learned from her this day:

1. Those candy bars are ALWAYS going to be there the next day, I don't have to have one today for fear they won't be there tomorrow.
2. Do I have to have that candy bar or do I want that candy bar?

When I go through a checkout line and hear that Three Musketeers scream at me, “Hey Laura!! Here I am! Come get me!!” I think these two things, it will be there next time and is it something I have to have? The answer to those things usually help me get past the candy to the checkout line.  And just in case you are wondering, yes that Three Musketeers really talk to me! Ha!

Now don't get me wrong, I am in no way cured!!! I am far from it!!! But what I have learned is that I can control that sugar addiction and attraction a little bit more by creating new habits. I do ask myself these two questions and if I still feed the need for chocolate, I find sugar free chocolate to satisfy me.

Sometimes, GASP! I am not in the mood for chocolate but still want a “treat”. With that I do one of two things, nuts and fruits. I love Walnuts and I can get a small container for a couple of dollars. I also look for some fruit that looks tasty. On the days they have fresh pineapple samples, SCORE! I love that!! Sometimes, that is all I need to satisfy that craving--a sample. This Christmas I was given a dried berry mixture that was quite tasty. There was not the fructose and processed sugar content in it, although there were some sugars listed. I am just trying to find ways to break my habits and give me alternatives to the whole sugar addiction.

Another thing I have read that works for some is to limit your sugar intake to drop pounds. For me just limiting does not work, I need to find ways to cut it out completely. But if you are saying you want to try this No Sugar, No Soda thing but can't do without the sugar, try taking your Grams of Sugar down to about 30 or so a day and see if that helps.  Does that seem doable? 

Well that does mean you need to look at labels. So there are some options for you on No Sugar Thing. I have found lots of interesting articles on the net about this, that I will share along the way.  I am too lazy to do that, so I will just cut it out and live with it.

I have a little exercise for you.  We have all heard about healthy foods or what we think are healthy foods.  This is one of my favorite foods that I THOUGHT was healthy.  And it is healthier than most things, but when I saw the sugar content, I thought WHOA MAMA!! And my focus is cutting down my sugar content.  If I was to limit my Sugar Grams to 30, this would just about do it for the day.  Any guess what it is? 

 What do most of you have a harder time with the No Sugar? Or No Soda? What are your ideas on how you are going to combat this and succeed at it? Anyone have any major breakthroughs? I want to hear from you!!!

Just remember Day 2 is almost over and you all thought you couldn't get by one day!!! Yeaaa Us!!!

Are You Ready For........

It is New Year's Eve and all I can say is GOODBYE 2010 – Hellooooo 2011!!! What a year and not in a good way. I am trying to remember than when we focus on the bad things all those “bad things” just seem to multiply. To kick off 2011 I am going to focus on the good things starting with So Long Sugar!! I am going to celebrate in leaving the sugar and soda behind!! How?

First of all, doing this blog and all your support has gotten me very excited and motivated. It is one thing to have a blog and a few followers, but our little group is growing. Now I have some accountability to me. If I fail, then I let all of you down and I can't do that.

Back in 1992 I heard a song called “Life's a Dance” I literally stopped dead in my tracks when I heard it on the radio because I felt someone had truly taken my life and put it into a song. I realized from that day that forward somedays I would be a leader, and some days I would be a follower. Today is my life's motto. Last year when I decided to give up sugar to gain some kind of control over my life, I never dreamed I would be able to inspire people just by giving up sugar.

Each week I have people come to me and tell me they can tell I have lost weight. It is a nice surprise in giving up the sugar and soda for 86 days and the weight loss, but that was really not my intent when I started. It was simply to gain some control in my life.

Then I thought maybe it was just a fluke. On Kathy's Blog One Bad Apple Dish Sue mentioned she had been off sugar for 4 months and lost 32 lbs!! So is it a fluke with both of us? I think not. Thanks Sue for the confirmation of the no sugar concept and the affect of weight loss.

Sugar is such a part of our lifestyles we think we can't do without it, but we can. We can find excuses, substitutes, work arounds (sorry I have done Tech Support for over 20 years ...there are always workarounds to things!) even variations of the things we truly like. We just need to start somewhere and begin with baby steps!! It's only a baby step!!!

My challenge to you is to give up sweets and soda till Valentine's Day – that is 45 days. Can you do it? I will start off by having some nuts, oranges and a couple of bottles of flavored water handy. Then if I crave sugar I will head for some Sugar Free Chocolate. Remember this is a great time to get some holiday stuff for cheap including Sugar Free Chocolate Marshmallow Santas!!!! LOL Okay I might get a couple, but I need to hide them!! You know make them harder to get to than in a sack by the computer?

So what are your plans for combatting this now that the New Year is upon us?

What do you all think about having a Countdown Calendar on the blog? Not sure if it is possible...but thought I could try it. And remember if you slip up, don't beat yourself up!!! Get back up, brush yourself off and try again. You only fail when you quit trying!!

Remember “Life's a Dance You Learn as You Go!” Here is a video with the song and lyrics if you have never heard the song...Life's A Dance

I'm Laura and I'm a Sugarholic....

Sad but true. When a friend first told me I was addicted to sugar I laughed! “I am not addicted to anything!” I boldy told her. After all addicts were all about drugs and alcohol, right? None of which I did. “Prove it then” she said to me.

“If you are not addicted to sugar, then you will have no problems giving it up for two weeks, right?” I thought piece of cake!!!

She challenged me to go on the Atkins diet for two weeks, just meat and vegetables. I took that challenge and learned a great deal about myself. I was indeed addicted to sugar. My first three days on Atkins I lost 21 lbs, could sleep all night long soundly, and went from having a hard time walking the driveway to my mailbox and back to walking a mile – all within three days. That was over 10 years ago and today I still battle that addiction.

Over the years I have learned a few things: when I tell people I am going off sugar they tell me I won't last and I normally don't. But I have had some successful runs, my longest being six months. This past year I decided to go off sugar and soda and simply gave up chocolate, sweets (pies, cakes, etc) and candy, as well as the soda. My last run was 86 days, and I am sorry I ever took that first bite of sugar again.

So here it is almost a new year and I am going to go at it again....are you with me? In my 86 days of being off sugar and soda I had people ask me how much weight I loss!!! Someone could tell I lost weight? Woo hoo!!! For me the only way I can lose weight, is by giving up the sugar and soda. It was a such a simple thing to do that I was not overwhelmed.

When I have gone on diets before, I think of all the things "I can't have". I see now I am focusing on large amount of "cant's" where when I give up the sugar they are all grouped together in two groups and it is less overwhelming for me. It's a step right?

Here are some pictures of the last year. What do you think?

The photo on the left was taken October 2009, the one on the right October 2010.

This was taken December 18, 2010.

One of the reasons I decided to give up sugar in September was because I felt my life was so out of control and that was the only thing I could control. I made it through Halloween with no candy and through various parties and other events passing each time on the sweets and candy. I know if I can o this so can you!!! So beginning January 1, 2011 we are going to start again, one step at a time and one day at a time.

There are a few ways we can do this, in quarters like businesses do? For holidays? I have not decided which way I am doing yet. I do know with the support here, we can all do it together. I have a favorite saying (I made it up myself) “Alone we cannot win the battles, but together we can win the wars.” This is a war we are fighting and we need to ban together.

If you want to join us, please come introduce yourself and

WELCOME!!!!